Husband and wife Jokes collections

If u r married please ignore this msg,
for everyone else: Happy Independence Day

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Before marriage, a man will lie awake all night thinking about something you say.
After marriage, he’ll fall asleep before you finish.

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There’s a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking.
It’s called marriage.

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Girlfriends r like chocolates, taste good anytime.
Lovers r like PIZZAS, Hot n spicy, eaten frequently.
Husbands r like Dal RICE, eaten when there’s no choice.

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Man receives telegram: Wife dead-should be buried or cremated?
Man: Don’t take any chances. Burn the body and bury the ash.

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Q: Why dogs don’t marry?
A: Because they are already leading a dog’s life!

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There was this guy who told his woman that he loved her so much that he would
go through hell for her. They got married and now he is going thru hell.

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Fact of life: One woman brings you into this world crying & the other ensures you
continue to do so for the rest of your life!

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Q: Why doesn’t law permit a man to marry a second woman?
A: Because as per law you cannot be punished twice for the same offence!

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